The First of Many

Oh what a time it has been. Oh what an adventure and chaos I've stirred up. The years that have passed and this little blog of mine is still hanging on. People out there somewhere are reading my thoughts and endulging in my words. You know I've felt like a piece of me was missing, like something wasn't quite right. I've been failing myself time and time again. I've tried to search for what is it that will bring me success(?) What will lead to happiness so that I dont feel so empty and forgotten all the time...but who am I kidding? I'm not forgettable...and maybe thats worse? Maybe thats where the pressure comes from because people who meet and have grown to love you are so confused...confused about what you're doing, where you're going? How much longer will you stand still in your own puddle of talent. Im a mother now, and I love it, tbh I never thought motherhood would be something I'd actually choose in this life. But I'm here and I've spent every day the last 18 months dedicated to my child so much so that I've forgotten what being dedicated to me looks like...so much so that I don't even know who I am outside of being a great mom. So lets start today. Like really start, lets start focusing on being the better version of us. I don't really know where to start to be honest but I know that somehow in my head me writing, and this blog, this online journal I've tossed to the side deserves something fresh and inspiring, I deserve something fresh and inspiring...My son, my lovely baby boy deserves a mother who is fresh and inspiring...

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